When United Methodists Disagree

Evidently, delegates to our West Ohio Annual Conference (June 6-10) will be discussing a controversial issue when we gather at Lakeside, Ohio in a few weeks. Delegates, which include both clergy and laity, have been given guidelines for how we are to discuss and debate this issue so that we do so in a manner that is Christlike.

These are the same guidelines used by General Conference which meets every four years and debates and votes on several issues, some being controversial. I think these are excellent guidelines and ones that we should keep in mind in the local church as well as in our day to day conversations. What do you think?

Guidelines for a Christlike Dialogue

Every person is a child of God. Always speak respectfully. One can disagree without being disagreeable.

As you patiently listen and observe the behavior of others, be open to the possibility that God can change the views of any or all parties in the discussion.

Listen patiently before formulating responses.

Strive to understand the experience out of which others have arrived at their views.

Be careful in how you express personal offense at differing opinions. Otherwise dialogue may be inhibited.

Accurately reflect the views of others when speaking. This is especially important when you disagree with that position.

Avoid using inflammatory words, derogatory names or an excited and angry voice.

Avoid making generalizations about individuals and groups. Make your point with specific evidence and examples.

Make use of facilitators and mediators.

Remember that people are defined, ultimately, by their relationship with God - not by the flaws we discover, or think we discover, in their views and actions.
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