When I conclude a wedding rehearsal, almost every single time, the bride will announce what time everybody needs to be at the church the next day. And there’s a different time depending on what role you have in the wedding. I’m always impressed by this, because the bride has this figured out to the minute.
Now, does it always work out? No. But at least there is a plan for everybody to be ready for the big day.
In our Gospel reading today, Jesus offers a parable about a wedding where some in the wedding party didn’t show up on time and they missed out. Evidently, they didn’t listen to the bride’s very clear instructions at the rehearsal. Those who missed out on the arrival of the groom are referred to as foolish. Those who were ready when the groom arrived are the wise ones.
What does it mean to be wise? Well, in this parable, being wise means planning ahead, making the needed preparations, and doing what needs to be done now so that you don’t miss out on the big event.
There are some of you who are probably thinking of people who need to hear this parable. Maybe you know of a procrastinator who is notorious for waiting to the last minute and being late for events.
But before we think of how other people are the foolish ones, maybe we need to first reflect on how we sometimes miss the boat.
I think of myself as a very responsible person. When I am conducting a wedding, I will be one of the first people at the church for the rehearsal as well as for the wedding. I want to make sure things are in place and ready to go. And yes, it can be frustrating when a key person doesn’t show up on time.
I conducted a wedding several years ago. About thirty minutes before the ceremony was to begin, I noticed that my organist wasn’t there yet. Even though there was still some time before the service, it was very unlike him to not be there by that time.
Then it was twenty minutes before the service and still no organist. Now, I’m more than a little worried, so I called him and it went straight to his voice mail.
Five minutes later, he still wasn’t there so with just fifteen minutes before the service, I needed to have a plan B for music. And by the way, this wasn’t just a small chapel wedding. There were probably 100 or so people in the sanctuary for this wedding.
I found the bride and told her about the situation and I asked her if there was anybody she knew who would be able to play some processional and recessional music. She scanned through the crowd and couldn’t find anybody.
So I said, “OK, here’s what we can do. For the processional, I will read I Corinthians 13, the love chapter as you come up the aisle.” She agreed and that’s what we did.
It was actually a very beautiful way to begin the service, although it would still have been better to have an organist. We then went through the service and everything went well. The problem was when it came time for the recessional music at the end of the service. I had been so concerned about the processional that I didn’t even think about a plan B for the recessional.
I announced them as husband and wife and the people gave this loud applause, and then everything went silent as the couple and the wedding party recessed out of the sanctuary. That actually felt like a downer to have no music playing.
Later that afternoon after the wedding was over, my organist called me to apologize. He said that he totally forgot about the wedding and that it was the first time that ever happened to him.
This happened to me as well but thankfully, it wasn’t for the actual wedding service. I ended up being a half hour late for the rehearsal. The time got changed and I had never changed it on my calendar and completely forgot about it. I remember telling everybody how sorry I was when I finally arrived for the rehearsal. I felt foolish like the bridesmaids in Jesus’ parable.
All of this to say that I think we move in and out of foolishness more than we care to admit. I used to think that this parable was more clearly identifiable of which side I’m on. Surely, I am one of those wise people at the wedding, fully prepared, alert, awake, and ready for the coming of Jesus. But, on closer look, I miss seeing Jesus more than I care to admit.
As I was preparing this sermon, I came across a video that showed three white members of a church in Californian telling a person of color to leave their church property. This young woman was simply sitting on the church lawn doing some reading when she was approached by these church members. Actually, it was much more passive-aggressive than that. One of those three church members was posting a “no trespassing” sign on a tree a few feet away from her.
She asked if that sign was meant for her and the church member said, “yes, and for anyone else because we don’t want anybody destroying our church property.” She said, “But I would never do something like that. I’m just sitting here because it’s so quiet and peaceful.”
Another church member just stood there during this super awkward conversation. You could tell on the video that he felt uncomfortable with what was happening, but he was probably friends with the other man and didn’t want to go against him.
A third church member came over to the woman and told her to leave as well. The woman sitting on the church lawn again asked why she couldn’t just stay there and the church member said, “there is a perfectly nice park across the street.”
As I watched this video and worked on this sermon, I couldn’t help but to appreciate why Jesus gave us this parable of being foolish and wise. Even though those church members probably do a lot of good work for their church, they missed seeing Jesus in that moment. They missed being gracious and loving in that moment. In that moment, they were the foolish bridesmaids.
Which leads me to think about how we are all susceptible to being foolish and missing out on Jesus. Jesus can appear in the middle of our day and we can miss him because we’re busy buying the oil for our lamps, when the true light of the world is standing right there in front of us.
As I have been reflecting on this parable, I’ve been wondering how we can help each other not miss Jesus’ presence. The parable is set up in a way where we all need to take personal responsibility in being ready, but what if we would watch and wait together? What if we would encourage each other to be alert and ready to see Jesus in our day to day living? What if the wise bridesmaids would have been more helpful to the foolish ones?
Or like the example of that church in California, what if that one church member who was feeling uncomfortable about the situation would have intervened by getting to know the woman who was sitting on the church lawn? Instead of just watching the other church member foolishly posting a no trespassing sign, what if he showed compassion toward that person who was sitting there?
I don’t know if that would have changed the mindset of the two other church members who were bound and determined to get that woman to leave, but at least it would have showed that there was a better way in handling that situation.
Watching and waiting for Jesus’ presence in our everyday lives is one of the reasons why our church emphasizes being part of a small group where we can encourage and support one another. Who helps you to be alert and ready in noticing Jesus’ presence? How can we help one another to see how God is at work in our lives?
Today’s closing hymn is one of my favorite hymns, “Blessed Assurance.” There’s a wonderful line in that hymn which gave me the inspiration for today’s sermon title. It’s in the last verse of that hymn.
“Perfect submission, all is at rest; I in my Savior am happy and blest, watching and waiting, looking above, filled with his goodness, lost in his love.”
Watching and waiting and looking above is how we are filled with God’s goodness and lost in his love.
Watching and waiting is what helps us to identify what we refer to as “thin place” moments, those moments when heaven and earth overlap in our ordinary lives. Being wise means that we are alert and ready for those moments where God shows up unexpectedly.
So, for those of you who are the wise ones out there, please help us foolish ones to be ready and alert so we don’t miss out. Maybe bring some extra oil for our lamps just in case we forget to bring our own.
Let’s watch and wait and look above together, so that we can all be filled with his goodness and lost in his love.
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