A United Methodist Pastor's Theological Reflections

"But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory (nikos) through our Lord Jesus Christ." - I Corinthians 15:57


Thursday, March 3, 2011

Dave's Deep Thoughts


Here's Pastor Dave McDowell's weekly devotional that he sends out to members of his church. Dave is my brother and serves as the Music Minister at Stewartstown UMC in PA.

She's gone.....

After 10 years,
she left without warning.

I have to admit that I never saw it coming,
but perhaps like many men,
I just wasn't paying attention.

Maybe, I was guilty of taking her for granted.
Maybe I didn't tell her I loved her as much as I should have.

I remember that I first met her in the grocery store.
I really wasn't sure about her when I first met her,
I'd be lying if I said it was love at first sight.
And to be truthful,
I really wasn't looking for her at that time in my life.
But it is said that the grocery store
is a great place for singles to meet.

I turned my cart into the next aisle,
and there she was.

At first, I wasn't sure that she was my type....
she seemed very different,
and yet there was something about her
that really appealed to me.

We agreed to get together
and after one date I knew I was hooked.

She was everything that I was looking for.
She was indeed, different from any other that I had ever met.
When I wasn't with her,
I couldn't stop thinking about her.

Soon lunch dates became dinner dates.
It wasn't long after that,
that we began to make excuses
to see each other mid-day.

After about six weeks
I knew that she was the one I wanted to be with
for the rest of my life.
Like anyone else who falls in love,
she was my elixir.
I couldn't seem to get enough of her.

She was refreshing.
She made made me smile and laugh.
She had a way of making the bad seem good,
as long as she was by my side,
I felt like I could get through anything.
She was always there to pick me up.
She would always be there to give me the lift that I needed.

She was.....well.....

Her name was Vanilla.

Don't get me wrong,
it wasn't that I had never fallen for anyone else before.
I had had relationships that were on and off again.
Some were nice, some not so nice.
But no one ever made me feel like she did.

I went through my cherry stage in the 70's
and then there was the lemon/lime stage.

I even wasted a few years on root beer
(a word to the wise.........
she will leave a bad taste in your mouth).

But just before I met her,
I thought I was destined to just be with a regular kind of gal.

But then came Vanilla.
Not just Vanilla.....Diet Vanilla

She tasted like a cream soda,
but with her, there was no caloric punishment.

She was so smooth and fine.
And she was so available.

At first she came in 2 liter bottles,
then there were 20 oz 6 packs.
She reached the height of her beauty
when she arrived with the convenient 12 pack cans with dispenser carton.

Looking back on it,
I should have known
that it was too good to be true.

6 years ago,
Vanilla lost her sleek 2 liter figure.

I asked the store manager, if he had seen her.
He said she wasn't as popular choice as they had thought,
and so she was only available in the smaller sizes.

I gasped at the thought
that the rest of humanity could not perceive Vanilla's beauty and grace.

Well, at least I still had her in smaller sizes.
That was until 2 years later.

I had gotten use to her 6 pack,
when I heard that
the public was still not pleased with her.
I remember buying up all the remaining 20 oz of her that I could find.
But that was fleeting,
it only last for the summer.
Like a summer romance fleeting into the cool of autumn,
I remember the last bottle.

That's when I became desperate.
I decided that no matter what people thought,
I still needed Vanilla in my life.

And so for the last 4 years,
she has been there for me
in aluminum can form.

Maybe I knew all long
that the relationship was headed for the rocks,
but I just didn't want to see it.

That was until 2 weeks ago,
when a stock boy told me she had left.
I would never see her again.

I remember fighting the tears as I went through the cashier line.

It is said there are 7 stages to grief.....
shock, pain, anger, depression, reconstruction, acceptance, hope

I could only hope that someday I would understand.

Well meaning friends have tried to tell me that she wasn't good for me.
that although on the outside she looked good,
on the inside she contained phosphates, aspartame, and
other words too big to pronounce.

But I didn't listen,
that is until the other day,
when I grabbed an empty crumpled can that was lying in the corner,
a painful reminder of Vanilla.
I read on her side.......

imitation vanilla flavoring

I then proceeded to move from stage three of grief immediately to stage seven.
I had been had.

There are many things in life
that look good on the outside,
but inwardly are destructive.

Sometimes it's not easy to differentiate,
especially when emotions get involved.
The older we get,
the more we realize, that time and experience
help to cultivate wisdom.
A few possess wisdom even in their early years.

Wisdom for the believer is learning to submit our will to the Lord's will.
Anything else is foolhardy.

As for this fool,
take away my Vanilla,
but don't you dare mess with my Raspberry Tea.

"The fear of the Lord, is the beginning of knowledge;
Fools despise wisdom and instruction."
- Proverbs 1:7

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1 comment:

$teve said...

Nothing personal Pastor Dave, but I did not like Vanilla. Sorry to disappoint you, but it is probably for the best that she is no longer around. Cold turkey is the best way to let go. Don't worry, someone else will come along. In the meantime, enjoy Raspberry
Tea. Someday, she too will be gone and you will have to go through the seven stages of grief again. I am sure that your brother can get you through these difficult times in your life. Oh, by the way, you have an "awesome" brother. Wish he were my brother.