Here's Pastor Dave McDowell's weekly devotional that he sends out to members of his church. Dave is my brother and serves as the Music Minister at Stewartstown UMC in PA.
Most people expect their wedding day to be perfect,
but do they expect the same for their marriage? for their lives?
Officiating at weddings is one of my favorite tasks as a pastor.
From the first pre-marital counseling session
to the final declaration of husband and wife,
I enjoy every part of the process.
As the officiant,
I try to see that the ceremony goes as smoothly as possible.
Usually they do,
but sometimes, things can get a bit crazy.
Wedding #1
It was a sunny late spring day, Everything was going as planned.......
that is till the final prayer.
Somewhere in between "bless and keep them" and the "Amen"
I heard IT.
You know what IT sounds like.
IT is that dreaded sound when someone is about to lose their cookies.
It was the flower girl.
Though small and demure, she had great aim.
She nailed most of the communion railing and 3 bridesmaids.
I don't recall receiving specific instruction in seminary
as to what to do when vomit and vows meet in the same room,
so I just plowed on through the prayer.
Meanwhile, bridesmaid #1 attempted to airlift the flowergirl out of the room.
This resulted in a second heave at the doorway.
I learned two things that day...
1)Never feed flowergirls greasy chicken tenders before a wedding
and
2)Bridesmaids hate it when their dresses get splattered with anything.
Two weeks later,
wedding #2 of the season.
Beautiful music,
a string quartet and brass ensemble.
I led the groom's party into the room as the strings began.
Boom!
Boom!
Boom!
Every step I took, resulted in a sound measuring
somewhere in between a sonic blast and an avalanche.
It was the wireless microphone in my pocket.
Sometime after I had checked the volume levels,
someone had fiddled with the settings.
The volume was now set too high.
Every step I took was an explosive stride.
Only I, and my pastor friend who was assisting,
knew what was causing the indoor fireworks sound effects.
Meanwhile the bridesmaids were beginning their processional.
The sonic booms then morphed into full blown feedback.
My friend and I both looked back at the sound station in the rear of the room.
No one was attending it.
My friend dashed back the aisle against the counter flow of the bridesmaids,
like a salmon swimming upstream,
to get to the sound board.
Women were covering their ears,
children were crying,
and men were trying to look brave and in control.
I am sure the strings played beautifully that day
but I have since learned that string quartets and feedback were never meant to co-exist,
no matter what key they were playing in.
Even though in both cases, the couples were successfully married,
I was now mired in a two game losing streak.
I was beginning to lose my pastoral mojo.
Then came wedding #3, a mid-summer nuptuals.
Beautiful flowers, large congregation,
and lovely weather for July.
Excitement in the air.
I was midway through the vows and I thought to myself,
"this is going very well."
Then it happened....
Groomsman # 3, a tall, slender lad fainted.
Let me say, that when someone faints in a public setting,
one quickly learns who the nurses are in the crowd.
The mother of the groom rose without hesitation,
and sprang into action.
Fortunately for the groomsman,
he revived before she needed to do mouth to mouth.
Some wedding photos were just never meant to be taken.
The losing streak had reached three.
3 weddings, 3 surprises.
I studied the situation....
Vomit, Feedback, Fainting
Phonetically, I was onto something....
I began to watch out for anything that began with an fff sound
(okay, granted vomit was a bit of a stretch)
I had one more wedding that season,
an outdoor fall wedding,
a beautiful Indian summer weekend.
I went to the site for the rehearsal on Friday,
looking for any potential wedding landmines that began with fff.
I saw nothing, that is till the wedding the next day.
I arrived and lo, what was placed just feet away on either side of where I was to stand??
TIKI TORCHES
with FFFIRE!
I envisioned my hair caught up in flames.
Somehow I avoided catching on fire that day,
even though I had left my flame retardent hairspray at home.
The wedding went flawlessly.
Streak over.
The first three couples are doing well in their marriages to this day.
And because of the surprises,
they likely remember their wedding days with greater clarity.
Weddings days dont always go off without glitches or bumps,
and life surely doesn't.
And yet Jesus said that our standard for life
is that we are to "be perfect
as our heavenly Father is perfect."
Sounds like a daunting if not impossible challenge.
I don't think I can make it through one day perfectly,
let alone a lifetime, or even a wedding service.
Things happen that are out of our control.
But what about the things that we can control....
our temperament, our emotions, our behaviors?
This quote of Jesus concludes a section of teaching on
how we are to love and live with each other.
God expects more of us than what most of us think is possible.
Loving those who are not loving to us.....
Including those in our lives who it would be far easier to exclude......
Offering compassion, rather than revenge to those who wrong us......
The word perfect might be better translated as mature or complete.
We aren't going to live mistakeless lives.
After all, our faith as Christians is predicated on the need for a Savior
to rescue us from our very penchant to make mistakes.
What God is asking us to do is to
examine the way He loves and likes us,
and to offer the same to those around us,
in other words, to live in His likeness.
If I would still be on this planet on the fiftieth wedding anniversaries of these couple,
I would hope that I could ask them,
"has your marriage, have your lives been perfect?"
And my hope would be their answer would be,
"Yes!
Despite all the challenges, the sicknesses,
the tragedies, and the surprises,
we have choosen to live our lives in His likeness."
Now that is perfection,
something that vomit, feedback, or fainting can't touch.
No go, and have a perfectly mature and complete day!
"Therefore, you are to be perfect,
as your heavenly Father is perfect."
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