The Blind Side -Encountering Highly Judgmental Christians

Football teams covet big and strong left tackles to protect their quarterback from 6'6, 280 pound defensive ends whose purpose in life is to blow up every single play. They like to approach from the blind side of the right-handed QB which is why you need an awesome left tackle.

Sometimes pastors need one of these highly coveted and well paid left tackles when they go about their ministry. Every so often we go back in the pocket to set up for a pass and WHAM!, we get hit from the blind side. We didn't see it coming. I'm not talking about NFL defensive lineman. I'm talking about highly judgmental Christians.

Fortunately, these blind side encounters only happen to me about three or four times a year, but when they do, you find yourself staring up into the sky and asking, What just hit me? Here's an experience that comes to mind.

It was around 10 pm on a Saturday night and I was about ready to go to bed. I got a call at the house that so and so was in the hospital which was about an hour drive away. It was a critical situation. No problem. Most pastors are more than willing to do what is necessary during times such as this or to at least arrange for someone to be there with the family.

When I made it to the hospital room late that night, the family was there with their loved one. I shared some scripture and offered a prayer. As I was leaving the hospital room and heading for the elevator door, a family member pulled me aside and said, You do know that his blood is on your hands. He isn't saved and he's a member of your church. What are you going to do about it?

I asked him, Why would you think he's not saved? His response was, He just isn't. I know he isn't. And he's going to go to hell because of you. I felt my blood pressure rising to unprecedented levels. I was being blind sided. Knowing that this man was under stress because of his relative's condition, I knew how important it was to not escalate the situation. As he continued to defiantly stare me down, I tried to bring some calm to the situation by letting him know that I would visit again. He offered no good-bye, no thank you for making the effort to visit them at such a late hour. He just stared me down as I made my way onto the elevator. 

Recently, our church received a highly judgmental email from someone in the community regarding one of our ministry events. After discussing how to respond to this person, I sent an email that was polite, courteous, and answered the person's question in what I thought was a very gracious manner. In return, I received another highly judgmental response from this person. 

We are taught in seminary to not take things personally. People say harsh things out of stress or out of misplaced anger or for other unknown reasons. That was some of the best pieces of pastoral advice I ever received. 

Over the years, I have discovered that it's not a 300 pound left tackle that we need. We just need to remember that the presence of the Holy Spirit is always with us. When those blind side hits come and they will come, remember that you're not alone. God is with you. And as tempting as it might be, don't try to be a defensive end and return the favor. That's not who you are.