A United Methodist Pastor's Theological Reflections

"But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory (nikos) through our Lord Jesus Christ." - I Corinthians 15:57


Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Clothes Don't Make the Christian: Dave's Deep Thoughts

 
Here's Pastor Dave McDowell's weekly devotional that he sends out to members of his church. Dave is my brother and serves as the Music Minister at Stewartstown UMC in PA.
 
I may be called many things.
But fashion conscious is not one of them.
 
It's not that I don't think clothes fashions aren't important,
I just don't pay too much attention.
 
Project Runway?
Snooooorrrreeee.
 
Shopping for clothes??
Can we just go directly to jail and not collect $200...
 
Fashion Shows???
I'd rather be shoving bamboo shoots
up my fingernails.
 
If clothing makes the man,
then this man is in trouble.
 
I can't remember the last time I bought clothes
apart from the obligatory socks/underwear purchase.
 
I have shirts that are older than some
of my students.
 
Zipper on the winter coat broken?
No problem.
That's what buttons are for.
 
Don't even think of touching my sweatshirt collection,
especially the 1980's editions.
 
My baseball caps.
Don't even go there.
You are walking on holy ground.
 
Some call them old.
I call them vintage.
 
I have only evolved to the place
where I begrudgingly surrender socks
that have more holes than swiss cheese
to the rag drawer.
 
For me, shoes go through a 5 phase life cycle.....
1)New & stiff
2)Broken in & comfy
3)Ruffed up beyond the help of shoe polish
4)Shoe laces deteriorating down to threads
5)toes beginning to appear
 
Only when I can see all 5 toes,
THEN I know it's time
to dispose.
 
Members of the church I serve
begged me to give up my purple suit
(it was plum, by the way and it matched the car I used to drive)
 
People have volunteered to give me a makeover
as a courtesy to all of humanity.
 
I think this has always been a personal problem for me.
 
When I was young,
I was part of the garanimal generation.
 
I should have known I was a fashion crisis waiting to happen
when I crossed the Tigger pants
with the Pooh shirt.
 
Trust me,
when elementary school teachers laugh,
it creates emotional scars.
 
I wore bell bottoms
AFTER the 1970s.
 
And when did the big flower shirts go
"out of style?"
 
There are some things in life
I have learned to simply accept.
 
But I think I reached rock bottom
two weeks ago.
 
It was two teenagers
who noticed first.
 
I am referring to my sneakers.
I was in in phase 2 of the life cycle.
 
Translated,
I had been wearing them for about 5 months.
 
The teens looked at them as I put them on.
"Why are you wearing different sneakers?" they asked
 
"They're not" I said.
 
"Yes they are, look at them" they responded.
 
Asking me to examing clothing/footware
is like asking a blind man where Waldo is.
 
All I saw were two sneakers that were in phase 2,
broken in and comfy.
 
"No look at them,
the linings are different colors,
and the patterns on the sides are different,
and the soles are different."
 
I hate when teenagers are right.
 
Now it wasn't that I had put on two different pair of sneakers that day,
I only have one pair that are in phase 2.
 
These shoes were purchased together.
 
I had been wearing different sneakers for the past 5 months.
 
Somewhere at the sporting goods store,
there is a sales clerk
who is more blind then I,
or who took a bet to see if there was a human being on the planet
who would purchase shoes that didn't match.
 
Collect your bet mister.
I do exist.
 
I think that's why I have chosen to be cremated.
That way, no one can come to my viewing
and gaze upon my final outfit and say between sobs,
"He was such a fine man,
too bad, he didn't know how to dress himself."
 
I realize that appearances are important.
They create first impressions.
They say something about us.
 
But they don't say everything about us.
And more so,
they don't say the most important things about us.
 
People didn't think much of Zaccheus because of his height.
How about John the Baptist who was arrayed in camel hair?
Throw in Moses who was a stutterer.
 
One was asked to dine with the Lord of the universe.
Another prepared the Messiah's coming.
And the other one led God's people out of slavery.
 
The short one had a passion to gaze upon the Lord
The guy with the camel outfit had a bit to say about repentance.
The speech impaired one trusted to let God do the talking.
 
Not bad for second impressions.
 
As for me, someday, maybe I will get my wardrobe together.
Until then, let me be known as being clothed in the righteousness of Christ.
 
And really,
who wouldn't wear a purple suit during advent & lent?
 
These who are clothed in the white robes,
who are they, and where have they come?
These are the ones who have come out of the great tribulation
and they have washed their robes and made them white in the blood of the Lamb.
Revelations 7:13-14
 

No comments: